i smiled today when i said no.

no more.

then i got into a heated argument in the morning.

most importantly, i said no more.

to whom may be reading,

this is a confession.

i forgot.

how it felt like.

happiness.

bliss.

love.

contentment.

life.

God.

the body is broken.

when the soul can only take so much.

when it feels like even heaven’s tears.

can’t wash it away.

how am I supposed to find peace and self?

this inability to take in life.

it’s like a black hole of negativity.

nothing’s really helping.

i’d smash away the bottles and pills.

but i’m scared i can’t do.

forgive me God.

i paved this rocky road of slow suicide.

and i only wanted to walk on your road.

“Existence is suffering” - Siddartha Gautama, Buddha.

i have so much to say

but i don’t know where to start.